Inside the silent night, under the dim light.
The white BMW car is parked in the desolated area. It is swaying.
The car is filled with the scent of the roses.
Xu Qin speaks up: “Would anyone notice us….. what should we do if someone sees us?”
Song Yan kisses her cheek and her shoulder: “It’s late, there would be no one here.”
“But…. ah……”
“…… is it painful?
“Em.”
“You are too tense.” He strokes her. “Relax.”
“….. woo……”
She lifts her head and pants. She moans. She curls up on her seat, she doesn’t dare to stand up. She feels scared yet pleased at the same time.
From time to time, she looks at the window. She is scared and shy yet she is encouraged by him.
Her body is hot, her mind is not clear. When they are done, she falls asleep.
She sleeps and feels he is helping her to wear her clothes.
The car starts to move.
She is sleeping deeply.
The car then stops, Song Yan covers her and carries her up. Xu Qin could feel her body is moving, she wants to walk by herself but Song Yan says to her: “Be good and sleep. Let me take you home.”
She finally stops moving and just leans on his embrace. She could feel his heart is beating fast.
After a while, she feels she is placed on her bed.
She keeps on sleeping. When she wakes up, it’s already morning. She stretches her body. She flips her body to hug Song Yan, yet she notices no one is on the bed.
This……
She sits up and looks around.
She just realizes that she is sitting on the faint purple bed. There’s a grey carpet beside the bed and a white hanging chair.
This room…….
There’s a cream colored wardrobe on the left side of the room, on the right side of the room there’s a window with a purple curtain.
She could hear the faint sound of bell.
She gets off the bed and opens up the wooden door. She goes to the living room.
The living room’s wall is in ivory color. There is a brown coffee table and moon-shaped light. She could see a lot of trees around.
She looks around the house
There’s a library at the house.
She explores each of the rooms of the house.
When she is done, she feels the whole courtyard is very fine and perfect.
She hasn’t found Song Yan after her exploration, she waits for him while sitting on the stairs.
She feels very happy, yet she couldn’t help but to cry.
That year she was young, she was envious of Jiu Jiu’s family for living at the courtyard. They looked so happy to live there. Everyday there were sounds of laughter.
She used to say: “Song Yan, I really like your house.”
He said that time: “It’s useless to just say it, do you dare to get into my residential certificate.”
She was silent for a while and she said: “Then give me a courtyard.”
“In this world, I like nothing. I also don’t like to meet with other people. I just want to have a courtyard, then I would lock you up inside.”
She wipes her tears.
Stupid.
She was envious not because of the courtyard but for the happy family they have.
Song Yan opens the front door and drags the suitcase inside. He went to Jiu Jiu’s house to get their things
“Why are you sitting here?”
She hears his voice and just runs toward him. She hugs his waist:
“Song Yan……..”
He holds her back and strokes his back. He jokes: “You don’t like this, why are you crying?”
She immediately shakes her head and says: “Song Yan, I really like this, I don’t want to go out anymore. I could stay here forever and not go out.”
Song Yan is startled, he didn’t expect to respond this happily. Her tears just fall down.
He strokes her head and comforts her.
She suddenly asks: “Song Yan, those ten years how did you live?”
He pursues his lips.
How did he live those ten years?
He endured everything.
That time she was drunk, she asked him whether he exerted an effort to get closer to her.
She doesn’t know about it.
For marrying her, for being with her, he saved bit by bit. He struggled hard for these ten years.
That time when he was seriously injured, indeed he had a mental break down. Then for everyday, he never be content with things as they are. He never thinks that they would meet again.
That time when he had his twenty years old birthday, he just got a bold initiative to spend all the money his father left her to pay for house down payment at Wu Fang Jie. Though that time the house at Wu Fang Jie’s house wasn’t expensive, yet it’s not cheap too. He chose to buy a broken now and renovated it bit by bits. He is lucky as the price of the house keeps on increasing. He calculated that time that his salary and renting fee are enough for him to pay for the mortgage.
He didn’t expect that on the middle of the journey to success, he was sentenced and tortured for half month. He was rescued but he couldn’t get his innocence back. He was cursing those who harmed him and his family. He got into the firefighting department. He started from zero again.
Those days indeed were the darkest days of his life. His dream was ruined, he failed in his career, his body was in bad state, he couldn’t preserve his courtyard.
He found a nongovernmental institution to borrow money.
That time he didn’t know where is Xu Qin, whether she would come back or not. He felt that time he almost lost his rationality, he was like a gambler. He just wanted to keep the most important thing for him.
Now he doesn’t really remember that darkest day. He just remembers that he is living a simple. He didn’t buy or spend his money. He spent his money for paying for his mortgage.
He tried hard to regain himself.
That time he actually knew indescribably that she would come back to him.
Just like that time when he was in fight with Meng Yan Chen on the skating rink, indeed she left him with Meng Yan Chen but the next day she came back to him.
Perhaps she hasn’t realized it, but as long as she is aware that Song Yan is waiting for her, she would come back to find him.
But for long days, she doesn’t come back.
Year by year, the house price kept on raising. He got more renting fee. He also got promoted and be financially steady.
Three years ago, he finally could pay everything up.
That time the renting fee he got successfully paid up all the mortgage. He had more money. He wanted to decorate it. He asked Jiu Jiu helps to help him make the furniture.
He browsed through the decorating book. He just knew that purple color is best to help people fall into deep sleep. Blue color helps people calm down. Green color is suitable for kitchen.
He put all his heart and energy to build this courtyard.
He got her car because he has more money now .
He is unwilling to let her wait for taxi during peak hour. He doesn’t want her to squeeze in the train.
As for why he gave her a white BMW. It’s because he saved her when she was on that car.
Yet she forgot about it.
She should think that he was a commoner.
She forgot that they met each other during the fire on the Wu Fang Jie, he remembers her car license plate.
……..
Song Yan tells Xu Qin that he had bought the courtyard long time ago. He just explained it in short and simple way. “I bought early, I even got a lot of renting fee.”
Xu Qin thinks about it.
Then he drags two suitcases inside: “What are you doing there? Come over and tidy this up.”
She regains herself and follows him.
“Let’s move bits by bits okay.”
They both come inside the bedroom and start to unpack.
Xu Qin is stupefied, she notices the things on her hand. She doesn’t know where should she put it.
Yet she feels naturally close with this house. She puts her clothes and underwear inside the wardrobe.
She places everything on its place.
Song Yan has few things so he is done faster than him.
“Do you need any help?”
“I could do it by myself.” She is enjoying herself.
Song Yan goes outside and sits down on the sofa. He falls asleep as he slept late last night.
When Xu Qin is done, she comes out of the room and notices Song Yan is asleep. She comes to his side and hugs him.
He asks her: “Are you done?”
“Em.”
“Song Yan?”
“Em?”
“Did you have a hard time at those ten years?”
He opens his eyes slowly: “It’s okay.”
She doesn’t believe him, yet she doesn’t let him know. She just smiles: “Really?”
“Really.” He is free: “It’s hard to train, but training is hard for the soldiers. When we got into the army, we vow to work hard so it’s nothing.”
“You vow too? Just like we do as a doctor?” Her attention could be shifted so easily. “What is your vow? I want to hear it.”
He smiles and frowns: “Let me think ah.” He says: “I would serve the people…. I wouldn’t be afraid to make sacrifice, I would fulfill my duty.” Actually he doesn’t remember it clearly. “I would work hard. I would struggle arduously; under all the circumstances, I would not betray the country, I would not betray the army.”
Xu Qin is startled.
She remembers that the second day after she had a drunken fit, he went to her house and that time he promised her too….
He knows from her gaze, she remembers that moment too.
He smiles lightly. “Yes ah, I wouldn’t betray you too.”
She holds him tighter. She closes her eyes and enjoys their togetherness.
They just hold each other silently.
She opens up her eyes and notices another big plastic bag nearby. “We still have something to unpack.”
“Let me.”
“Let’s do it together.”
Xu Qin takes out the things on the plastic and finds a large wooden case.
Song Yan takes that box from her, he doesn’t know what is this. Now he is curious about it.
“What is this?”
Xu Qin wants to snatch the box back.
But Song Yan is quick.
“What is this?”
“Ahyoo, these are my toys.”
Song Yan says: “You are lying.” He opens it up.
Xu Qin wants to take it back: “Give it back to me!”
He smiles: “Xu Qin, stop it, If I’m being provoked, you know what would happen. Do you want to play in this broad daylight?”
She glares at him. She is still the pain of being tormented last night. She just makes some spaces between them.
He turns his body to open the box up.
The box is opened. There are man figurines inside the box. All of them looks like a young Song Yan. Each of the wooden figurines have different expression. They are like him.
Song Yan is startled. He feels so happy like he gets treasures. “These are me?”
Xu Qin blushes: “Ah, do you like them?”
“Nonsense.” He takes out one by one. “Wow, it’s too similar.” Woo …… this expression, this action, it’s too alike. My hairstyle….. Jiu Jiu still has this clothes!…….”
“Why don’t you give it to me earlier?”
“It’s not for you.”
“So would you give it for?!”
“These are for e.” Xu Qi says.
Song Yan asks: “When did you carve it?”
“When I was abroad.” Xu Qin says: “Because…… I don’t know how do you like, I just carved it based on my memory of you.
Song Yan strokes her face and asks: “Xu Qin?”
“Em?”
“How did you live those ten years?”
She thinks for a while and says: “I studied, worked, then nothing.”
He says nothing and looks at those figurines.
He notices one of the figurines is wearing a basketball uniform with a short hair. He stops.
That hairstyle, he was on Year 9 when he had that hairstyle.
He looks at her: “When I stopped you on your way, didn’t you say that you don’t know me?”
She giggles: “I lied ah.”
Song Yan clicks his tongue and says: “Alright, just lie then.”
She smiles and hugs her.
She suddenly confesses to him:
“Song Yan, I only love you. Only you.”
That day few years ago, in a summer day.
That night she just moved to a new school. She entered the new classroom. She was the only new students. No one minded her.
At night self- study time, the teacher called each one of them to give self- introduction. The class was lively.
She was sitting on her seat and held her hands tightly. She looked cold.
Suddenly the bell rang.
She was too nervous to wait for her turn. She felt that she needs to talk fast so she wouldn’t delay anyone.
The teacher suddenly said: “Our class is over, then……”
She was stupefied. She wanted to raise her hand but she was afraid, she didn’t know what to do.
Then suddenly there’s a voice.
“Lao Lu, this girl hasn’t introduced herself!”
She looked back yet someone was blocking her sight.
Everyone was looking at her.
She stood up and went in front.
She said: “I am Meng Qin.”
“Everyone starts asking.”
No one asked her. Everyone showed no expression or interest.
She blushed and wanted to leave.
That man spoke up again.
“Which Meng and which Qin?”
He was asking like he wants to know her name clearly.
“Zi Min Meng, Shui Xin Qin.”
“Good girl.” That man said.
She looked at his smile, his eyes were glistening.
Starting from that moment perhaps, he is like a fire that warms her up. He is different for her.
If not, how could she stay silent when he was blocking her way? If not, how could she would not try to probe him? inspect him? provoke him? make him angry? She always felt secure and safe with him.
It’s love for him.
He seems to be knocking on her city and said: “Could I come in?”
She opens her door for him and says: “In the future, you couldn’t leave again.”
and he says: “Alright.”
Then, we should be together forever.
But that time she seemed to be insensible, she left him and ran away for ten years.
yet everyday during those ten years, she noticed her heart never opened again.
I’m waiting or you in my city.
If you are not coming, then I would be lonely all along.
Luckily through the hardship, you still come back.
Let everything gets sorted out.
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